My Evil Buddies and Me
by Yomolly
Summary: A girl who envies books sent me this challenge to write a story where Kidflash, Flash and the rogues were all friends. So I wrote this song fic based off the song from PnF Mission Marvel.


"HEY WEST" Wally inwardly cringed at the familiar voice. Micheal Sanderson A.K.A 'Whiplash'. The one thing Wally hated most about civilian life, no compromising your s.i.d. That includes not telling certain bullies where they can...

"Are you listening pipsqueak!?" Wally came out of his musings to find himself trapped against his locker with Whiplash invading his personal bubble and his posse obscuring the scene from onlookers. All Wally wanted was to make it safely to his last class, then meet up with Hartley and James afterward.

Before the brute could say anything else a shout came from down the hall.

"Hey! Guess what I got!" Wally knew that sing song voice anywhere. Before the bullies turned to look at James Wally met Hartley's eyes over there heads. He clenched his eyes shut and put his hand over his nose and mouth. Taking the hint Wally quickly did the same.

With his eyes closed he heard a zipper, then five thuds. When he heard the all clear Wally opened his eyes to see a smiling Hartley next to an equally beaming James holding a stuffed pig.

Eyeing the teens on the floor he noticed the zipper on the pig's underbelly. "What did you put in that thing?" He made his way toward his friends, not bothering to step over the bodies.

"My special sauce. Molded pork, spoiled milk curds and heatwave's dirty socks." The other two cringed at the last item.

"Not that it isn't satisfying to see them sprawled like that, but we only got three minutes till final bell." Wally quickly grabbed his compatriots hands and thanked every deity that the halls were empty as he raced them to the last class.

* * *

"I'm just sayi..."

"SHH" Wally shushed James again as they crawled through the vents in school.

You see, it all started when Whiplash and his gang decided to pants Wally during gym. Which wouldn't have been as embarrassing had Wally not been sporting the only pair of underwear he had left in his drawer. His aunt Iris had given him them, they were white with little frogs and lily pads, not so bad, just not so...manly.

Of course the cheer squad just so happened to be practicing around that time too. And the glares and laughter he received from tripping over his pants and falling into the pyramid of cheerleaders in his haste to pull his outer clothing up only made his blush deepen. Which just made it that much worse.

So that's how they came to be here, with his two partners in crime paused right above his arch nemesis' table with a stolen vat of last years mystery stew.

"I told you this would come in handy."

"Yes, thank you James. Just be careful you don't spill it. I'm already going to have to throw this shirt out when we get home. Hartley, you ready?"

With a nod they began tipping the pot over the table, they all shared a smile as it started oozing out. Albeit slowly.

"Is there anyway to speed this up?" Wally would wish he had more patience. Just as he said this James answered by moving forward attempting to scrape it out with a rubber spatula not realizing what his extra weight would do.

Before the other two could stop him, dropping the pot in turn, he had leaned to far over and the pot, the piper, the trickster and the speedster fell out of the now broken vent and landed on the table below them.

Fortunately the party at the table were covered in more of the greenish brown slime than the occupants on the table. However this was not to last for long.

With a five second pause for everyone in the cafeteria to register what had happened, James jumped up with a glob of goop in both hands.

**"FOOD FIGHT!"**

* * *

Wally didn't want to admit to being amused by James' actions, but watching a sixteen year old snorkeling for coins in a fountain only shin deep was a rather funny sight.

As James continued to _earn _his money for parts to complete his newest invention Wally sat and finished his history project with Hartley at the side of the fountain.

* * *

"What are you doing?"

"What does it look like we're doing." Hartley deadpanned before picking up another pebble.

**_CRASH!_**

"HEY YOU KIDS! STOP THROWING ROCKS THROUGH MY WINDOW! THOSE CLOCKS ARE ANTIQUES!"

"Do you guys always have to get me in trouble!?" Wally huffed at his friends as they ran from the burly mustached man.

"But did you see him freak?! It was hilarious!" Wally rolled his eyes at his James.

"Okay, now that that's o...Where are you going?" Wally stared inquisitively at the two repeat offenders as they split off down the street.

"To our next stop. Whiplash lives two blocks down this way. Come on." Wally's curiosity won out as he fell in step with his longtime friends.

* * *

"PLEASE!"

"I said no, kid. Your Uncle told us specifically no caffeine after two." Wally frowned.

"No fair. I thought Uncles were supposed to spoil there nephews." Cold just rolled his eyes at the pout.

"Kid, even I ain't dumb enough to see what happens if I let you break this rule. Just hearing the effects from Barry was enough warning not to mix you and soda thanks to the long lasting effects caffeine seems to have on you." Wally huffed with exasperation and stuffed another piece of triple cheese meat and veggie lovers pizza in his mouth.

"Oi, Cold. We're outta milk!" Digger paused a moment before continuing. "And we're suspiciously low on vinegar as well."*

"Well why don't you go get some, and grab some more snacks for baby flash while your at it." Digger scowled at the back of Cold's head.

"Fine. Come on kid. I'm gonna need some help gettin everything." Wally sighed and got up to join his Aussie of an Uncle in pulling on his boots and coat.

"Take Hartley and Sam with you too. James snuck a Mountain Dew and we don't want what happened last time occurring again." Cold said without looking up from cleaning his vast array of weapons parts.

Digger paused, shuddered at the memory, and called for the two aforementioned people.

The trip to the store was uneventful, while they were there however...

"HEY PIPSQUEAK!" Wally groaned as he went to pick up the bag of chips he dropped on the floor. He mentally cursed the five males hastily approaching him.

"Mommy send you out to the star for eggs and sugar?" The bucket heads with him laughed.

"No actually. We're out of milk." Wally went to turn away in search of Digger or Sam when a hand reached out and grabbed him. Before he could say anything though...

"You might wanna let him go." Wally's head whipped around in shock. There stood Dick in faded jeans, green sweatshirt and tinted glasses.

"And you're gonna make us, shawty? Pretty boy like you ain't got enough led in your britches." The whole group doubled over while Wally silently stared at the boy wonder.

Before the brutes could recover they were each efficiently and effectively incapacitated by the baby ninja bird. Wally rubbed his sore arm before approaching his friend.

"Not that I don't appreciate the butt whoopin on my behalf. But, dude, what are you doing here?"

"I've been trying to find you so we could talk, but you didn't pick up your phone, you weren't at home like the GPS on the stupid thing said and you were and you weren't at your Uncles. What gives?"

Just as Wally opened his mouth Sam called for him.

"Wally! We got what we came for! It's time to go!" He glanced back at Dick.

"Sorry. I'M COMING! But I gotta go. We'll talk later at the mountain, promise."

"Wait, Walls. Who's that?"

"My...Other, Uncles. Yeah, and, they really don't like to be kept waiting soI'llseeyoulaterwe'lltalkatthemountainBYE!"

* * *

"YOU MIGHT WANNA RUN!" Wally paused his conversation with Hartley as James ran past him holding...bags?

"YOUNG MAN! YOU COME BACK HERE WITH MY SWEEPER REFILLS! I NEED THOSE YOU HOOLIGAN!" Wally gaped incredulously at the old lady yelling after James. His friend stopped at the ladies last sentence.

"I NEED THEM MORE!" He blew her a raspberry and kept running. Wally had to duck and marvel at the distance the lady was capable of chucking shoes at as he watched it barley miss the retreating form.

"He's going to get himself killed."

* * *

"KID!" Roy wasn't suppose to be here, but certain puppy dog pouting birds have a way of convincing you to do anything, _anything. _Roy shuddered remembering last Halloween before directing his focus on the downed speedster.

The rest of the team were still trying to fight off the rest of the rogues.

"CEASE FIRE!" Out of nowhere a giant white flag flew down ensnaring the young heroes including Roy before he could get to Wally.

"Stay away from him!" He snarled as they circled the red head.

"Cool yer jets ya ninny." Captain boomerang didn't even spare him a glance before turning to Mirror Master. "Kid didn't eat, he needs somethin quick."

Mirror Master nodded grimly and the team stared dumbfounded as they watched Trickster cradle the speedsters head. "Sam, there's a hot dog stand down the street in front of the old timey shop."

Not a minute later "Sam" came back with the whole stand. Working in sync the began hastily piling every condiment the stand had to offer before hitting the mark on Wally's wrist to wake him so he could eat.

"That's it Baby Flash, eat it all up." The team stared on in silence as the rogues continued to help Wally eat. As soon as he was done he nodded to Cold.

"Thanks Uncle Len."

"No problem kid. We'll call it a night and reschedule for next weekend, a'ight?" Wally nodded and watched in silence as half his family disappeared into the mirror-verse. Without a word he cut down his shell shocked teammates and gently nudged them toward the bio-ship.

Just before they took off Robin caught his arm, he looked up to see both he and Roy glaring at him.

"We are having a talk when we get back to the mountain." His voice left no room for discussion, and Wally simply nodded.

* * *

_***!**_I used to have the lyrics up, but apparently it's against the rules even if you didn't copy and paste them. Either way, if you know the song you'll get it.

*Vinegar spoils milk easily, leave it out for a few days and you have curds.

_"Is your head just suddenly going to burst into flames? Or am I thinking of another guy?"-Doofenschmirtz_


End file.
